


"Sir, This is a McDonalds." Retail(?) AU. Because that's what I'm writing now, apparently

by CloudDragon



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Retail, Bad's a game store employee who runs D&D sessions sometimes, Canon?? I'm sorry I've never met them, Crimson (Dream SMP), Dungeons & Dragons References, Fluff, Gen, I hate having to re-do tags I forget all of the crazy freeform tags I did this sucks, I'm not completely caught up on that lore but I LOVE it so I'm including it anyways, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Paradise Found, Quackity's just a tired law student trying to survive capitalism who ends up as a therapist, Rated T because it'll probably have swearing someday, references to the Crimson, that's it that's all I have planned for the fic so far
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:47:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28057119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloudDragon/pseuds/CloudDragon
Summary: I should probably put a quote here or something, something that shows my writing style and such, but I've had a long day and I had to close the tab and lost the several hundred word summary I made for this thing and I'm not doing that again so I'm sorry that this is sort of a mess.Anyways, it's exactly what the title says! I saw some fanart on twitter- https://twitter.com/aalfierd/status/1333062531603177473?s=19- of a minimum wage worker AU? And sort of fell in love with the idea and decided to write about it. It's probably going to mostly be a vaguely-connected series of short bits of fanfic that'll eventually form a story. Be warned, I have a very bad case of "Starts too many fics that never get finished" and read this story at your own risk.But yeah! If you're interested in a slice of lifey AU, then I hope you'll enjoy this! And if you don't and decide to keep scrolling, I wish you luck in finding a fic you'll like more. Have a nice day!Also: This fic isn't really about minecraft? But it's far more a retail AU of the dream SMP than of the real people so I tagged it like that. If this should be changed, let me know and I'll do so!
Relationships: I know fundywastaken will happen because the small bit of plot I have relies on it, None yet but some'll probably happen eventually
Comments: 6
Kudos: 8





	1. A meeting on the Docks

Tommy hadn’t been expecting to make a friend when he went down to the docks after a long day at work, but life decides to surprise you sometimes so that’s what happened that day.

It was December 8. Probably too cold - No, actually, _definitely_ too cold - to be down by the docks, but he, in Wilbur’s words, had “a mild and slowly worsening case of dumb bitch disease” and was thus there anyways.

He liked the docks. Liked listening to the ocean, the way it felt like music to his ears. It was peaceful and calm, without the chatter and business of people.

He liked people too, but having this time to himself where there wasn’t anyone else around was special.

So when he got to the end of his favorite part of the docks, where he often sat and watched the ocean, and there was someone else there, he wasn’t sure how to feel.

“Uh. Hey.” He said, giving a small wave to the other teen who turned to face him.

“Hello! Nice day, isn’t it?”

“Nah, it’s actually pretty cold.”

The other boy nodded. “Yeah. It is. But still nice.”

Tommy took a few steps forward, then sat down beside him. “..You come here often?”

“Nah, this is my first time in the area.” He said. “You?”

“Yeah. I come here pretty much every day, at least when it’s warm enough.”

The other boy smiled, his expression shifting to be almost teasing. “I thought you said it was cold.”

“Well I didn’t _realize_ it would be this cold when I made my way over here.” Tommy said, shouting at first and then quieting down as his sentence went on, almost mumbling by the end. 

“Ah, so that’s why you’re wearing such a light coat.” The other teen said.

“Yeah, I guess it is.”

“Are you cold? I think I’ve got a spare hat if you want to borrow it..” The brown-haired teen took off his backpack, opening it.

Tommy laughed, more out of surprise than anything. “That’s a bit of an odd thing to offer.” He said.

“Is it?” The other teen asked, looking up at Tommy, eyes wide as if he genuinely hadn’t known that.

“Yeah, I don’t think people typically offer hats to strangers they meet on the docks.” Tommy said.

The other boy nodded slowly. “Well, still..” He said, pulling a greenish beanie out of his backpack and placing it on Tommy’s head, adjusting it so it was in the proper place. “There we go! Is that warmer?”

Tommy paused for a moment, unsure what to say, then nodded. “Yeah. Thanks.. What’s your name?”

“Tubbo. Yours?”

“Tommy.”

“Well then, it’s nice to meet you, Tommy!” Tubbo said. He glanced down at the watch(Were those.. Bee designs?) on his wrist. “I’ve got to get going, but it was nice meeting you!”

“Nice meeting you too.”

Tommy watched him go. _I’m going to need to give him this hat back at some point._


	2. Late-Night Lucidchart Lineages

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don’t know what I was doing with the start of this chapter, I just sort of did it. But to come up with a short quote that summarizes the chapter..? Bad makes Late-night lucidchart lineages. That works I suppose. I'll use that as my chapter title.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> brief reference to the crimson egg subplot, but I’m not actually entirely caught up on that so if I got something wrong, sorry

Ten fifteen PM. Or twenty-two fifteen, depending on what type of clock you preferred.

Bad preferred the former. Sure, the latter was easier for quick math as to the number of hours that had passed, but he was more used to the two twelve-hour sectors and preferred them.

Ten sixteen PM. Ten seventeen.

Bad tapped his keyboard idly, lost in thought. He should probably actually write something, anything now, even if it was just brainstorming.

He already had the world ready, he’d done sessions in it before, he just had to figure out how to take these characters he’d assembled(It’d mostly been the work of random number generators making the decisions, actually, but he wasn’t going to tell the people that.) and fit them into the world.

Which was a tad bit harder than it seemed.

He scrolled back up to the list of traits he had for each character. No names for any of them yet, which made planning a tad bit difficult, but that was something he could get around.

He had an elven exorcist whose parent was a force of good, apparently, and had to work that into the lore of the world.

He had a human hunter who was exploring a new continent. Certainly something he could work with.

And he had a halfling archaeologist who had apparently saved their home from danger at some point.

The exorcist part of the elf was actually a surprisingly simple thing to work into the story; One of the main villains to most of the parties he had explore the world was the Crimson Egg, a strange red entity that spread its vines everywhere it could get them and invaded people’s minds. So he could just have the elf be a member of the Homebrew Druid subclass he’d created that specialized in keeping back the crimson to maintain the order it threatened to overthrow, known as the Blue Druids. That was simple enough and fit rather well.

The harder part was figuring out who their parents were, if one of them was going to be important. He’d made the family trees for several of the important families in the city-state the character would likely be from, so he couldn’t just put them into one of those and call it good. Which meant he had to make up some new family, which meant he had to make a family tree for that family and work out their history in case it was brought up at all during the session.

He rested his head between his hands and sighed. It was going to be another late night, spent fitting random characters for a one shot session for Dungeons and dragons day, into the lore of the world he’d been building.

_ Well. I’d best get to typing. _

So he pulled up lucidchart and started on yet another family tree. He’d keep this one simple, promise.

(He didn’t.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Or, basically, the art for the AU didn’t give him a job and so I decided to make Bad an employee at some tabletop game store. A tabletop game store that sometimes has dungeons and dragons sessions people can join, and that’s what Bad’s planning. So.. yeah. I actually wrote multiple chapters for this within a not-super-long - It’s only been what, two, three days? - span of time since the first! Yay! I’ve even already got the third pretty much ready to share(Yes I wrote the third before the second, I- I don’t know why either really). So I guess I hope you enjoyed the chapter and I’ll probably have the next one out within a couple of days! (Okay, before you say "but it's been like nine days Cloud", I wrote this on the fifteenth. Literally only a couple of days after sharing the first one. Just got submerged in homework and didn't get the chance to share it so this now no longer makes sense as an end note but I've still got two things due tonight, two late assignments and three things due tomorrow that I need to get to so I'm not re-writing the end note but want to get a chapter out. Have a nice day)


End file.
